People face ageism and other intersecting forms of discrimination in many ways in our society. Women, by and large, are disproportionately impacted by ageism. From a young age, we are conditioned to believe that our value is tied to our youthful appearance and “marketability." As a result, the beauty and fashion industry perpetuate a narrative that keeps women in “the trance” of unworthiness.

Policies and services must be adapted to reflect our changing population structures to ensure that everyone, young and old, has equitable access to services and entitlements. Yet, this is only part of the tragedy of the ageism story.

Meet Kat Miller. Kat has an MA in spiritual psychology. For the past 35 years, she’s been counseling, teaching, and consulting. Her passion is using aging as a catalyst to breaking free from cultural conditioning and discovering truth and wisdom through our own direct experience. Kat also uses the medium of photography to express the inherent beauty of aging and impermanence.

Show Notes:

• Aging is a positive, natural, and beautiful process, but we’ve been enculturated to think otherwise.
• Ageism happens when people face stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination based on their age.
• Because of ageism, older people are excluded from jobs and social services.
• It also increasingly underpins human rights violations such as elder abuse and financial exploitation. In many ways, ageism is the last socially accepted form of discrimination.
• People that are aging are generally slowing down, and in our society, that is almost taboo. In terms of enjoyment of life, however, it’s actually a very positive thing.
• As we get older, physiologically and emotionally, we are slowing down because and not quite so involved with performance anxiety that we've had throughout our younger years, which is very liberating.
• There’s no such thing as good or bad when it comes to aging. We tend to hold others to a measurement based on whether they are “aging well” because they can still do yoga at age 102, and then we idolize that as somehow ideal or a “good” version of aging.
• “Wow, you look amazing for your age" is an excellent example of ageism.
• Ageism is like the last frontier of social change that’s truly got to shift if we want to change how we live our lives and love ourselves well.
• Men are often considered “handsome” and sexually desirable well into their 50s, 60s, and 70s and are still considered for lead roles in movies. This is not so for women.
• The U curve of happiness is a metric of how we start our lives happy and carefree, and in our 20s, 30s, and 40s, we become less so, but then into our 50’s and up the curve trends upward again.

Links:

• The Paradox of Aging: the Happiness U-Curve - Margit Cox Henderson, Ph.D.
• Gangaji – Spiritual Teacher and Author on Natural Intelligence and Emotional Healing
• The Revelation Project Episode 44: Linda Freedman - UNACCOMPANIED Children: Alone in America
• Ashton Applewhite: Let's end ageism | TED Talk
• Kat's Heart of the Matter
• Work with Me | Kat's Heart of the Matter

I had the opportunity to work with her a few years back and the project changed me. It had a profound impact on shaping my understanding of what it takes to make an impact, and that when you really desire to do something in service to others, nothing is impossible.

Linda is the writer and producer of UNACCOMPANIED: Alone in America, a short film that shows what happens when unaccompanied children cross the US-Mexico border and appear in immigration court without a lawyer. The film has been viewed online by more than 50 million people in over 170 countries and won a special award at the Indie foreign film festival.

After working as a documentary filmmaker for the last decade, Linda has shifted gears and is now writing instead of producing stories that she hopes will have the same impact as unaccompanied. She's completed the pilot for a limited TV series on unaccompanied children and a second pilot for a TV series about the trauma response work that she does. She lives in Portland, Oregon with Mateo, her yellow Labrador retriever, and recently discovered a new way to stay in shape - non-contact boxing.

• In recent years the number of unaccompanied immigrant children migrating to the United States has nearly tripled and they have no representation or legal counsel, leaving them vulnerable and alone.

• In mid-March 2014, Linda was sitting at her breakfast table reading The Oregonian. She came across a piece written by Anna Ciesielski, a young lawyer working for Immigration Counseling Service, who represents unaccompanied children from Central America in immigration proceedings. She described the situations these children face and the nature of her work with them, and it broke something in Linda.

  • Under U.S. law, children arrested for entering the U.S. illegally have no right to a court-appointed lawyer.
  • Although most children don’t speak or understand English, they have no access to interpreters. They don’t understand U.S. immigration laws; laws so complex, most adults aren’t able to comprehend them.

• Children have no way to contact, communicate with, or hire a lawyer.

• Linda spent months talking with and filming interviews with pro bono attorneys who had represented unaccompanied children. She attended immigration hearings and talked to anyone who had any experience working with unaccompanied kids.

• Because the Department of Justice does not allow recording devices in immigration hearings, it felt impossible to convey the story that needed to be told. Linda became so disheartened, she shelved the project for more than a year.

• Finally, a new approach took shape, film a reenactment of the children's circumstances in the most realistic way possible. With the help of an amazing team, we brought the vision to life.

• Over four years later, and with timing that was devastatingly appropriate, Linda was relieved to finally be sharing the story of unaccompanied children, the forgotten ones, who have no one to guide them, hold them, or serve them.

• Linda is now writing a pilot for a series she hopes will get picked up.

• Linda has a son with Mobius syndrome that she admires so much due to his mindset and resilience.

• Linda was born in 1940, making her 80 years old, and she never tires of learning and taking risks.

• Linda believes that the combination of curiosity, passion, and perseverance means that you can do anything

Please donate here!

Links:

• UNACCOMPANIED: Alone in America - YouTube
• Book: Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance: Duckworth, Angela: 9781501111105: AmazonSmile: Books
• Website: Trauma Intervention Programs - Home
• Film: The Wisdom of Trauma – Gabor Mate Film
• Instagram • Catherine Blackledge (@catherine.blackledge)
• Article: 'Vagina is not a rude word': the scientist fighting to empower women, one word at a time | Books | The Guardian
• Article: Snatch squad | Books | The Guardian